Tired of playing with your self in your bedroom? Feel like making people watch? Well you’re in luck because Shape has organised a DJ competition and if you’ve always wanted to get a shot at playing in a club then you would be mad to miss out on this opportunity…

Submissions are now open to all DJs who do not currently hold a club residence, to enter: record a minimum 30min mix of Electro, Indie, Disco, Baltimore, House and anything else that makes the kids lose their shit. Email a link with your name and contact info to ticktock@shapebar.com.au or drop a CD in to SHAPE before Tuesday 24th November. Heat 1 commences Saturday 28th November, Heat 2 is Saturday 12th December, and the Final is on Boxing Day – Saturday 26th December.

The winner will be given the chance to play at Origin NYE Festival alongside some of the worlds biggest electronic artists, the opportunity to join the Tick Tock DJ Roster, $500 cash, a pair of RPDJ1200 Headphones a $100 voucher from Mills Records. The runner-up will receive 2 Tickets to Origin NYE.

Who’s playing? – Peaches plus special guests
Where? – Astor
It all starts at… - 8pm
How much? – $61.40
How do you get in on this? – Tickets on sale Friday November 13 from Bocs Ticketing, Planet Video, Mills Records and 78 Records.
Who’s going to be there? – people into electro rock and those who just want to cut loose to awesome music in a movie theatre
You’d like it if you were… drunk, high

Heads Will Roll says…

Did you miss out on Big Day Out tickets and were you worried you weren’t going to get the opportunity for a hypersexual 42-year-old woman to grind in your face? Well you’re in luck because Peaches is coming back to town. Her latest album, I Feel Cream, was awesome and the best thing Simian Mobile Disco did all year (read HWR’s review here), so we’re super excited to have her back. The last time she was in town it was for a DJ set and those tickets sold out super fast so don’t hesitate in buying your tickets when they go on sale.

Another Guy says…This is a much better idea than watching her, outdoors, in 40 degree heat.

Purchase tickets here

http://www.peachesrocks.com
http://www.peachesofficialblog.com/
http://www.myspace.com/peaches
http://www.facebook.com/event.php?eid=173533278909&ref=nf

A colleague of mine was recently overpaid $7000 by our employer. Naturally the money was responsibly spent by snorting blow off of strippers’ legs, cheap cocktails, and partying in a hotel room with a dwarf rabbit named Fredrick. After he woke up, terrified and coming down in a bathtub full of ice he noticed Fredrick was missing with the briefcase of money. In an attempted to piece together his past 24 hours I sifted through a handful of $50 notes that were scattered throughout the bed sheets, interwoven with rabbit fur and an 8-inch stiletto, and I started to wonder about free money.

Everybody knows a story of a couple kids who stumbled across a briefcase stuffed with cash and did the noble thing by handing it into the police . What would you do? Would you hand the money into the police? Would you hand in the whole amount? Because hey, who would notice if few thousand dollars went missing from the briefcase by the time you handed it into the police? Surely the money is drug money, so it’s not really stealing, is it? But what if the drug dealers stashed the money because they knew the bills were marked, so when you go to purchase that 100inch plasma TV, the Tactical Response Group will come repelling down the side of the building and ram your head through the glass counter, arresting what they believe to be Australia’s biggest dope dealer?

Making decisions for yourself can be hard, mainly because there is no one else you can blame when those decisions end up with awful results. Luckily men, bearded men, have thought it wise to write down their theories on how to make decisions, and the best thing is when you’re using other peoples logic you can pass the blame onto them.

Let us ask, “What to do if we found a large sum of money?” by throwing it into a steel cage match of Rawls’ Veil of Ignorance vs Mill’s Principle of Utility. Without the worry of self-blame we are sure to find an answer where we always end up the winner…

What is Mill’s Principle of Utility?

‘Seek the greatest happiness for the greatest number’

Mill’s Principle of Utility states, when considering an ethical situation, one must try to make the decision that will benefit the most number of people in the most positive way. When making an ethical decision one must figure out who will be affected by that decision and how strongly they will be affected by that decision.

It is not only about the greatest number with Mill. If a large number people are only slightly benefited by an act and a small number of people are greatly disadvantaged, then the decision is not ethically justifiable as, the pain felt by the few outweighs the joy felt by the many.

How can it solve our problems?

Those who would be the most affected by your decision, whether to keep the large sum of money you found, would be yourself and the person/s who hid the money.

Using Mill’s principle you could justify the potential happiness of deciding to hand in the money outnumbers the potential sadness of not handing in the money.

The sadness and happiness of the person/s who hid the money will remain fairly constant because with whichever decision you make they end up without the money.

The deciding factor then becomes the sadness experienced by going to prison for a few years, due to the police having marked the money, and how that would far outweigh the joy of getting to freely spend bulk money for a couple months.

Even though possibility of being caught by the police is not as high as having an amazing time, blowing through a large amount of money with a dwarf rabbit named Fredrick, the potential sadness of years in prison with giant bear of a man named Fredrick is far greater.

Ethics is for ‘tards, you’ll never take my money!

Not happy with the decision about deciding to hand the money into the proper authorities? Well the brilliance of using ethical principles to make hard decisions is you can decide to ignore the ethical principles that go against the decisions that you really want to make and find one that will.

Let’s take a look at Rawls’ Veil of Ignorance.

What is Rawls’ Veil of Ignorance?

‘Justice emerges when negotiating without social differentiations’

The idea behind Rawls’ Veil of Ignorance is the notion that, when considering an ethical dilemma, one must consider the reactions of everyone involved in the situation. One must consider how they would react as, if they were, any one of the people who would be affected by the ethical dilemma.

How can it solve our problems?

Using Rawls’ veil of ignorance with the situation of discovering a large sum of money first we must consider who are in the interested parties involved with the large sum of money.

If we decided to keep the money those involved would be:

The person/s who found the money – If you found the money and decided you wanted to keep it then you would have bulk cash to buy shiny things.

The friends and families of the people/s who found the money – If your friend or family member suddenly came upon a large amount of cash they would, unless of course you were always a jerk to them, buy you lots of awesome presents.

The person/s who hid the money – You would be pretty bummed to go back to your hiding spot after waiting till you were definitely sure the fuzz was finally off your arse and discover the money had gone missing.

The people/s who created the reason for hiding the money –If you had been tailing a criminal and your whole investigation was dependant on linking the large of amount of money with that criminal you would be pretty disappointed in your wasted time, but at least you got paid for it.

The Australian Government – If you were a member of a Federal Government who was trying to take claim for the state of the economy a sudden increase in retail spending might give you an opportunity to claim that you are responsible due to the finding of stimulus checks that had gotten wedged at the back of couches across the homes of battling Australian families.

If we decided to hand the money into the police those involved would be:

The person/s who found the money – If you had discovered a large amount of money and decided to hand it into the police, for the rest of your life, you would beat your self up thinking of all the awesome things you could have spent the money on. This will of course spiral into depression, which could only possibly end by throwing yourself off of the tallest building you know, which unfortunately for you is your parents 2 storey house, thus adding suicide to the ever increasing list of things you suck at.

The person/s who hid the money – If you were the person who hid the money you would be pretty happy because even though you didn’t end up with the money you’re pretty sure the police were onto you and now they have no evidence to send you to prison.

The people/s who created the reason for hiding the money – If you had been tailing a criminal and you knew this caused them to be so paranoid they virtually volunteered to hand the money into the police themselves you would be able to sleep fairly soundly at night knowing the work you are doing is really making a difference.

What does Rawls want you to do with the money?

With Rawls’ veil, when deciding an ethical dilemma, one must think how they would react as anyone of those involved. Using this theory you should keep the money, because deciding to hand the money could lead to life suffering with depression and failed suicide attempts and nobody would ever choose that option for themselves. The worst possible outcome for any of those involved, if you decided to keep the money, is for the people who hid the money because they end up without any.

Learning how to use ethics for those big questions can save much time and anguish because always remember if you don’t want to make a decision for yourself there are plenty of other people out there who are happy to make one for you.

Are you like us and can’t wait for Proxy’s debut album to be released? Well you’re in luck because Turbo has just unleashed the EP Who Are You/8000 to tide us over until his album is completed. We at Heads Will Roll are really excited by how different 8000 sounds to the rest of Proxy’s singles and hopefully this means his album is going to be fairly diverse. Make sure you watch the video past the 3:20 minute for a pretty massive drop that’s set to crying fans and exploding rockets. Принесите его дальше!

Who’s playing? – The Prodigy, Empire Of The Sun, Franz Ferdinand, Boys Noize
Who’s idea was this? Future Entertainment
Where? – Ascot Racecourse
It all starts at… – 12pm
How much? – Presale $110+BF (password is a Headlining act) GA $136 +BF
How do you get in on this? – Tickets on sale 9am Wednesday October 21
Who’s going to be there? – Except a broad range of dance music fans
You’d like it if you were… sober, drunk, high

Heads Will Roll says…

I went to a festival at a racecourse once. Every time I had to cross the tracks to go to the toilet I made the joke that I had to “piss like a race horse”. That joke is going to be recycled for Future 2010. “What does the Future Music 2010 sound like” I hear you ask? Well it sounds like the past (yep another recycled joke, I know but everyone is so worried about the environment these days). The Prodigy are headlining, and sure they will put on an entertaining spectacle of a show but does anyone actually listen to the Prodigy anymore? Is there anyone out there can honestly say they turned on their iPod and actively chose to listen to a Prodigy album in the past 5 years? Shuffle mode doesn’t count. Fresh from, um, playing Parklife, Luke Steele brings his Empire of the Sun show. Interesting choice that one, you would assume everyone who wanted to watch EOTS would have watched the show at Parklife. I really can’t imagine too many people going back for more or Luke Steele gaining too many new fans in 5 months. Franz Ferdinand standout as the first rock headliner for Future Music however previously acts like Datarock, Who Made Who and CSS have brought their guitars to the festival so it shouldn’t be too shocking. Boys Noize will be touring his new album Power and is Heads Will Roll’s most anticipated act on the line-up. Stay tuned to Heads Will Roll as more acts and hopefully some after parties are announced.

Another Guy says… Inhale inhale. You’re the victim

http://www.futuremusicfestival.com.au/
http://www.ticketmaster.com.au/Future-Music-Festival-tickets/artist/1096627

First Announcement:
The Prodigy
Empire Of The Sun
Franz Ferdinand
Booka Shade
John Digweed
Sven Vath
David Guetta
Erick Morillo
Above & Beyond
Dubfire
Boys Noize
Does It Offend You, Yeah?

I was thinking the other day, “you know what this state needs? It’s more public groping.” Well lucky day, lucky day, Colin Barnett has decided to make that a reality. Mr Barnett has decided to give police the power to stop and search anyone, without probable cause, in designated areas. These areas will include entertainment precincts, like Northbridge and Fremantle, as well as beaches, like Mullaloo and Scarborough.

I can imagine Tourism WA’s new ad campaign. There will be smiley faces of families walking down the beach, through the city shopping, down along Northbridge towards a restaurant for dinner and dad will get stopped, pushed up against the wall, legs spread, as a smiling police officer pads him down in front of his shocked wife and kids, the screen will fade to black and the tag line will say “Come to WA, you’re safe in OUR hands”

“There will be cries of infringement of civil liberties but we make no apologies if we give law abiding people, families and young women, the freedom to go to places without fear for their safety,” Mr Barnett said.

Yes Colin, I’m a sure every young woman going out wants to be touched by police officers. I’m sure they’ll all be feeling much safer in the knowledge that the fingers of justice are abreast with the situation.

The biggest concern is if we don’t have fight for these basic human rights now, where does it stop? Under the proposed laws search areas will have a designated time and place. If the law passes how long will it be until the police won’t be limited to designated times and places? How about in your homes? What if Colin Barnett decides “law abiding people, families and young women” are so terrified that he will give the police designated suburbs, which they can enter homes, search people and all of their possessions, just in case a person might be breaking a law.

To the people who might say “If you’re not breaking any laws then you have nothing to worry about?” Well what about the humiliation of being searched in the street by the police like a criminal? Surely people who aren’t breaking the law do no want to be treated like criminals?

To find criminals the police should be conducting investigations; they should be finding facts to prove which people are committing crimes and then searching those people. If there isn’t enough police to do this work then hire some more. I for one do not want to live my life in fear that one day I might be detained, probed and prodded by a person in the street.

You can read The West Australian article here.

Who can we make our complaints to?

Colin Barnett
Premier; Minister for State Development
Address: 24th Floor, Governor Stirling Tower,
197 St Georges Terrace,
PERTH WA 6000
Telephone: 9222 9888
Fax: 9322 1213
e-Mail: wa-government@dpc.wa.gov.au

John Day
Minister for Planning; Culture and the Arts
Address: 13th Floor, Dumas House,
2 Havelock Street,
WEST PERTH WA 6005
Telephone: 9213 6600
Fax: 9213 6601
e-Mail: Minister.Day@dpc.wa.gov.au

Donna Faragher
Minister for Environment; Youth
Address: 10th Floor, Dumas House,
2 Havelock Street,
WEST PERTH WA 6005
Telephone: 9213 7250
Fax: 9213 7255
e-Mail: Minister.Faragher@dpc.wa.gov.au

Dr Elizabeth Constable
Minister for Education; Tourism
Address: 19th Floor, Governor Stirling Tower,
197 St Georges Terrace,
PERTH WA 6000
Telephone: 9222 9699
Fax: 9222 9288
e-Mail: Minister.Constable@dpc.wa.gov.au

As I walked through Wellington Square I noticed it was decisively louder and a lot more crowded than my usual Sunday strolls. I lined up to use a toilet and a passing group of oiled up, shirtless men were kind enough to inform me the reason for the crowds was the 2009 Parklife festival.

Lost in a sea of muddled sounds I found Busy P playing some new and interesting songs. Busy P talked in between and during tracks, which is a massive pet hate of mine, however I can always make an exception for Busy P and the girls flashing their bare breasts for his camera didn’t seem to mind much either.

As with any outdoor event the best sound for each act can require a bit of moving about. Anyone expecting the sound to be awesome wherever they decide to stand needs a reality check. I wandered through the crowd to find a better position and all hell started to break loose. Fences came crashing down, crushing the tired people who were sheltering from the surprising heat. Stampedes of men, old enough to know better, had just jumped the fence and were doing their best to avoid being grabbed by lumbering security guards. I’m ok with fence jumpers, when they’re kids, because they could be underage, too poor, just experimenting or don’t know any better. Adults should know better, and they definitely should not lash out and start punching female security guards once they are caught

Bored of the violence I turned my attention back to the stage, which had become inhabited by MSTRKFT. They played vigorous dance tracks with their trademark DAR NAR NAR NAR riff over the top. The crowd responded at first but when a set is played continuously, at the same level, for a long period of time it stops from being energetic and just becomes dull.

Luckily sets were being kept short and Crystal Castles came out before too much of the crowd was lost. Alice did her thing of screaming into the microphone, which was thoroughly entertaining until someone ran on stage kicking out some leads. The leads happened to be connected to some vital equipment, which killed the music for a few moments. Those moments turned out to be a few too many for the face chewing mob I happened to be surrounded by. In a manner of seconds it all turned weird. A smaller one was knocked to the ground and the larger, more dominant males bent down and started to tear the flesh from his body in a vein attempt to harvest the remainder of the drugs that were still pumping through his limp lifeless body. I felt disgusted by their cannibalistic behaviour but at the same time I respected them for their obviously strong belief in recycling. The music came back on and order was restored, but apparently the damage done was irreversible so we were treated to a 5-minute noise extravaganza as Alice smashed apart a drum kit and threw its pieces into the press photography area.

Erol Alkan was rolled onto the stage and Parklife was lifted to another level. The craziest, heaviest sounds you’ve never heard came tearing through the speakers. Erol kept playing with the crowd using massive build-ups and then dropping the music back with fat, speaker destroying bass. It was impossible not to dance. We were treated to the brand spanking new Boys Noize song Kontact Me (It’s the one that goes “come with me… do you remember?), as well as Waves and Death Suite, the songs co-created with Erol. Erol’s remix of the Yeah Yeah Yeahs Zero went down really well but the highlight of his set was a live reworking of his Justice Waters of Nazereth remix, and if you thought that song was heavy before, this new version sounded like a tank being driven at full speed into a munitions factory.

Tiga closed the Air stage and he opened with his brand new remix of Miike Snow Black & Blue (you can download that song legally here for free). It was always going to be difficult coming on after Erol, however Tiga was helped by being better known to the majority of the crowd. Tiga tore into a set full of acid house and banging techno, which would have fairly quickly scared off anyone who was expecting to hear a mix of the quirky electro pop that Tiga generally fills his albums with.

As the clock struck 10pm Fat Cat was released to tuck us all into bed. With Perth now regularly enforcing 12am lockouts on Sunday nights there was never any real hope for Parklife acts to make an appearance at the after-parties scattered across town. I would love someone to attempt to explain the logic behind trying to force thousands of people to exit the city at the same time from a city that has almost non-existent public transport. Maybe we should organise 10 000 people to try and enter Parliament House 5 minutes before closing time and see if that helps knock some reality into a government that is clearly out of touch with lives of the youth of today.

Who’s playing? – Muse, Groove Armada, Calvin Harris, the Horrors
Where? – Claremont Showgrounds
It all starts at… – gates open at 11am
How much? - $140+bf
How do you get in on this? – tickets on sale October 9, online and usual outlets
Who’s going to be there? – people ages 16-35.
You’d like it if you were… sober, drunk, high

Heads Will Roll says…

The Australian summer is one filled with sunburn, beers, barbeques and music festivals and The Big Day Out is the oldest of them all. The BDO toured acts, which could never have performed in your town without the backing of month long festival. The Big Day Out became a right of passage of kids getting into the live music scene. It’s multi-genre set-up allowed for kids to try new and different styles of music for themselves. It really didn’t matter who was on the line-up because if there was an exciting touring act, come summer they would be playing at the Big Day Out. Now the industry has changed, international touring acts rarely skip cities and smaller, more genre specific festivals have launched, became popular and grown into large institutions of their own. With the massive influx of touring festivals the Big Day Out can’t keep expecting people to pay the large sums of money just for the “festival experience”. At least once a month, from October through to April every year, you can get drunk in the sun with a mob of like minded people to a backing of loud music. So now, more so than ever, the headliner AND the quality of the other acts on the line-up are becoming increasingly important. This year the Big Day Out has secured the services of Muse to bring their shows to a close. Muse will, without a doubt, put on an audiovisual experience worthy of the headliner slot, however do they justify the $140+bf ticket price alone? I suppose your opinion on Muse will answer that question for yourself. The second headliner looks at this stage to be Powderfinger and with Eskimo Joe and Grinspoon on the line-up the Big Day Out appears to be looking to its past line-ups for inspiration. Still a festival featuring the likes of Peaches, Dizzee Rascal, the Horrors, Kasabian, Lily Allen, Ladyhawke, Midnight Juggernauts and Girl Talk can’t be all bad can it?

Another Guy says… it’s going to be very hot, like every year.

Tickets
http://www.bigdayout.com

First Line-Up

Muse, Powderfinger, Lily Allen, Eskimo Joe, Groove Armada, Grinspoon, the Mars Volta, Ladyhawke, Dizzee Rascal, Karnivool, Peaches, the Temper Trap, Kasabian, Midnight Juggernauts, Rise Against, Magic Dirt, Mastodon, Lisa Mitchell, the Horrors, Bluejuice, Calvin Harris, Kisschasy, the Decembrists, Tame Impala, Girl Talk

It’s not long to go now and I bet you’re getting just as excited as we are. Here is some information I’m sure a lot of you have been holding out for; it is the 2009 Parklife time table. Click the image and behold the internet in all of it’s glory…

**** These are the set times for Perth Parklife ****

other city times can be found here

Who do you want to see the most? Who are you going to miss out on? Which stages are you going to spending most of your time at? Love the timetable or hate it? Sound off below.

Channel surfing I came across a reality television show where a contestant had caught a turtle in a river and decided to eat it. The contestants smashed open the shell, shredded the turtle and boiled it in a pot. Watching the chubby contestants on the show talk about how delicious the turtle was all I could think about was the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. What if the constants were eating a pre-ooze Michelangelo? What if the constants had gorged themselves on all of the pre-teen un-mutated ninja-less turtles? Would we live in a world devoid of Ninja Rap? I for one do not want to live in that world.